Stress management in prison

Content warning: This episode discusses stress, mental health challenges, and the realities of life in prison, which may be triggering for some listeners. The unique stress behind bars including isolation, uncertainty, survival, and our personal experience and coping strategies. If you’ve ever wondered about the intense toll of prison life, we hope you tune in. 

*If you have any questions for us, please let us know. 

Transcript

SPEAKER_01 0:00

Hey everybody, welcome to another episode of Cartel's Commentary and thank you once again for tuning in. This is L Nascar. I am happy to bring y'all to another episode. And I am here with El Meman. L Memon, how are you feeling today? Oh, you're feeling. I'm feeling amazing. I'm feeling good. You're ready to push this episode in. Alright, alright, alright. I say uh so today we're gonna we back we back in jail today. We're talking some more jail stuff. We're gonna talk, we're gonna talk about stress and more or less, not just stress, but like some things that that be stressing us out in here. So I don't know if you want to tell us all something that that stresses you out in prison. Well, for me, I believe the number one thing, the number one stressor in here for a lot of us is the especially when you got a lot of time, the fact of not knowing will you ever get back out. On top of like what is, especially if you got family that's going through like health issues or like any type of issues that in a pre and back in the and and back in the time, you would have been there to to to give them that support that they need, that they that they was looking for. But as though you're not there, that's another added stress for us in here. But like me versus the number one big, big stressor for us in here, I feel like, is we got we got a lot of that time, the fact of not knowing when you ever get back out of here, because like they say it's easy to get in here and get in trouble, but it is hard, excuse my language, to get out. Absolutely. It's so hard to stay out of out of trouble. Can you tell all star off why? Because, like, in here you literally have it's like out there, in here you literally gotta think for a bunch of people, not to mention, you know, on the outside, if I'm around now, on the outside, if I go to a grocery store, I go to a fast food restaurant, I go anywhere, I go out, and I'm around a group of people that I don't feel, I don't like, and like I'm not feeling the energy, the vibe, I can get away. And here, you can't do that, especially if it's like you're on a tear, it might be your cell buddy, it might be the dude that's sleeping a dome with you or something. So it's like you really can't get away from people in here. Like you're you're in close, you're in close corners with them. Oh, that is that is where that that freedom, like being grateful for for just little freedoms like that, because like you say, like in here it's it's healthy boundaries that aren't set. And you know, it's easier to set them on the street because of that freedom. Like that, that's what that's what binds us to certain things in here. Like, and you know, that's that's something that be stressing me out is that freedom because because of time. Like, you know, in here you're not on your own time, you're on you're on other people's time. Like, you have to eat or or you know, take a shower or cook on other people's time, not when you want. And that really gets in a way as an obstacle for when you got the other things, because that time where it's your only time to do those things, it might be like more important stuff going on. Absolutely. Like that is that is how I am in here sometimes when it comes to like because I can stress myself out a lot because I can be in my I be in my head a lot. So, but that being said, like I have been practicing lately as to like uh uh uh uh picking up new new de-stressors to to to help me with it, but it's all about what it's all about what you do with them thoughts though once you get them. Like, if if I am stressing about something and I'm and I'm having negative thoughts about it, but I do now is I think the good out of it. Because every bad thing, it's something good about it. It's something good somewhere in it. We just have to we have to find it, we gotta seek it out. Would you say the prison mentality stresses you out? Yeah, yeah, and I can yeah and nay, because yeah and nay, because now when it comes to the prison mentality, you got some people that they live by the prison mentality, and like that's what they thrive on. But you got a person like me. Now, granted, when I first came in, I thought that that's what I had to do. I had to I had to adapt to the the the the the prison entire. I had to ad I thought that's what I had to do to survive and like keep people from messing with me the whole time. All I had to do was know how to think. That's it. I just did I just I just had to know how to think better than the next the prison mentality, like it can be stressful because my idea of what the prison mentality is, because like you know, you hear people say the street mentality or or prison, it meaning like it's only one way. It's only one way to do things, it's only one method, like, and that's like that's not having an open mind, that's not being willing to, you know, accepting better ideas or new ideas that we haven't tried, like the prison mentality, like it was something I was dealing with recently because, you know, uh being in a in a different environment, you know, that uh because I was telling, you know, me and Ellen were settled in in that other building we was in for some years, for a few years. And, you know, had jobs and in here, you know, it's very hard to get comfortability in prison. So, you know, when we have it, it it's definitely something that we're very grateful for. So since I've been down here, the prison mentality was something that I was struggling with. And for the last three weeks, it was something that I did every day or in my routine that you know, the other day, I'm saying something to me about when we was down in the other building. And I used to I used to do it back then, but the the at that time I had stopped because that comfortability was it was there for me, and I had faith. And it worked for me back then, so I knew it would work for me now. Yeah, I don't know. That was something that we had both did. And when when we did this, it was like flipping off a light switch. I remember you remember that? Oh, yes, I know exactly what you were talking about. And that night, I was glad we did it that day. Like, I wish I really could tell y'all what it is. I want to tell us all you see what it was we did, but know that what we did, it was for the betterment of our stress level, our mental, and all of that. So let me ask you this, Al Nascar, since I'm on this question. Because we were just on the topic about prison mentality. So let me ask you, what is it about the prison mentality in the different prison mentality that stresses you out? So the it's it's the like safety and security above all, like whether it's finances or anything, the feeling of I need to do this, I need to do that, I need to know this, I need to know that. Like, you know, you'll be in yourself watching TV, or it's a hot summer day, it's 110 degrees in the cell. I got my fans on low because I want to hear the tear. I don't need to know what's going on the tear because it it's it's nothing on the tears that's gonna harm me, be a threat to me because, you know, I'm I'm doing all the right things. So, you know, that those were things we should was back in a time, you know, when we was, you know, when we were struggling, making bad decisions and being involved in the things he was involved in. That's the beauty in those, you know, like you say, them de-stresses and positive vibes. Like when we did when we did that light switch, like I was telling y'all, it the second we did it, it was like it sent electricity through my body. Like I felt I felt amazing because it's like I knew that I was taking a lot of weight off my shoulders because I always was like, all right, I need I ain't do that yet, I need to do this. Or like, man, I got always gotta make sure I might be like, damn, I did I forget to do that. Like, but now I don't have to do none of that. That is a whole weight off my shoulders. Absolutely. So now when you you know when you put it, man, when you put it like that about like the like the the company worrying about in life prison, like I definitely agree with that a hundred percent. Like, and a lot of a lot of us in here, because I'm not just one of single people out because when I speak of and I want to start one nation to know. When I speak about in here, I'm not speaking of specific groups of people. I'm speaking on us as a whole, because I'm in here with all these other incarcerated individuals. So when I speak about like this prison life, we're speaking about us all. Like, if I say we, if I say I feel like they need to fight more for more rec, I'm included in that because I'm in here too. So with that being said, Alan Ascar just said something about like like when we are in themselves, when we are in ourselves and like they got stuff going on in here, and you just like you constantly want to know what's going on out there. Like, I dealt with that for years. I dealt with that for years, and I know one of the reasons why I dealt with it. I dealt with it because like past, like you, you, you, you sometimes your past uh, sometimes your past haunts you. It ain't catch up to you yet, but it haunts you to let you know. To me, I feel like it haunts you to let you know, like it's not forgot about, like the stuff that you did or like the things that you did to this person or that person, like it's never, it will never it will never be forgotten about, and you will pay for it soon or someday. And I'm so glad that you brought this up because you know, stress and and suffering and like dealing with my past was a huge part of my like transformation. And done in the past can be uh it can be a weakness or or it can it can bring us down sometimes. And you know, I read a quote in a book, uh, and and it said something along the lines of like we can't transform our pain into you know some other positive or happiness, we will never have happiness. And I liked that. And and I always look, like you say, like when we have those thoughts, like I need to know, I need to know if this person is coming. Now, like like you say in our past we might have had these thoughts because of a number of different reasons, but that's when we can ask ourselves if any of those reasons still apply. Because if they don't, like you say, like that's us, that's us transforming, getting over them old thoughts and old behaviors because it's so burnt into our nature. Like we did it every day, you know, so many times or or constantly on our mind. So, you know, that's another good way to do that. All right, and like another, like another thing that is stressful or through here is when we think of it's like when we when we think of when we think of things that we have done, and we may not have wanted to do it, but I don't know what made a person do, I don't know, but like yes, I can say like that past haunting them is like can be added stress because and like I say, it has happened with me in here a few times. Like I think of stuff that I did that I I really regret, and like I beat myself a lot, I beat myself up in my head about it a lot. Like I do that a lot, you know. I beat myself up in my head about a lot of stuff that I can't even change, that I don't have any control over. And that's another thing that I'm working on right now, like not stressing about stuff I have no control over. Right. And like I'm I'm glad that you said that too about like things that haunt us because like that those are those are a desire to be better. Like those should that's a like a revelation. Like I always look at those things as you know, it's it's like a teachable moment. It's like that thing that we went through before was a mistake, and you know, like our mistakes don't define us, they refine us. So like what can I what can I take out of, like you said, that's something what's the what can I take out of it as far as, you know, a learned lesson, even if it was out of mistake, something that I did wrong. I the good in that is that I learned and I will never do it again. And you know, that's another way we can we can move forward with with with some of that, you know, dealing with our past. And you know, that's another reason why it's always good to remember like the energy that we put out there. Again, like another like learning from our mistakes, because we always gotta treat people how we want to be treated, right? Absolutely. Always treat people how you want to be treated. And another thing, another thing that I wanted to say, that I was no idea, I pray to God that you never end up in a place like this. Female or male, I pray that y'all never end up in a prison or jail cell or nothing. But know this. If you ever do for any reason, never regret none of never regret nothing you do in here. Because I say that to say, always make sure you make the right decision, always make sure you go with your gut, always have a battle, buddy. And like I say, that uh takes a lot of stress away because we get we we we get ourselves into a lot of stuff in here, not really knowing, like it's not really knowing what it's all cracked up to be, you know, just like uh just like I can say, just like how, just like how politicians are. Sneak Havbo, they're telling us this, he's gonna, they telling us they're gonna do this, he's telling us we're gonna do that. But they're literally telling us this just for us to vote for them. And it can be the same way in here. You got people that uh watch you for a week or a month, and they fly, no, no, they tell you this about big big gang, big organization, big group of people they walk with, they tell you all this stuff, and they see the wheels are turning in your head. You like it. So it's like, all right, I got it. But the whole time, once you take the oath, it's like, whoa, you didn't tell me none of that. You didn't tell me I had the whole multiple novel. You didn't tell me that I had to go stand with person the first week. I get like you didn't tell me none of this because if you did, I wouldn't have did it. That's why I say always make sure you go with a gut, you make the right choices and decisions in in a place like this, always have a battle body. That way you got odds in the front and the back. Absolutely. It's it's it's so important to have that that trust. And you know that that segue us into some one of our new segments that we're gonna be doing on here, and it is going to be the level of a Star Wars. And I'm gonna let El Memen break down the acronym that level is before we move any further. Now, the levels acronym I love it. Because like I was watching something one day and like it stood out to me. Like, it it it it definitely stood out to me. Now this level acronym, I'm gonna give you I'm gonna give you my acronym for it. And you can put it any type of way you want. You can leave it this way, or you can put your own spin to it. But the acronym that we have for level, it is the first L is for leadership.

SPEAKER_00 17:04

Always want to be a leader.

SPEAKER_01 17:07

The second letter is the E, and that is for education.

SPEAKER_00 17:11

You always want to educate yourself. Knowledge is power. The third letter is a V, which is for vision. Always have a vision, always know what you want in our life and know where you're going. Always see the situation clearly. The fourth letter is effort. E F F O R T.

SPEAKER_01 17:39

Always, always put forth the best effort you can. Because you're gonna always get the best results with the best effort. You put poor effort, you're gonna get poor results. And last but not least, love. Love is God, and God is love. You can't say you love God, but you hate your next door neighbor or you hate your classmates. Can't say that. Then you don't love God. Because God says we are supposed to love all of our brothers and sisters. Believers, unbelievers, all of them, because they are his creation. We all are like, have you ever heard the phrase it's it's levels to this shit? What do you think people mean when they say that, uh? Now, when they say it's levels to this stuff, they're literally meaning we're not our level yet. Meaning we're not on the same page yet. Meaning we're not, we don't have the same mindset right now. And it's really, it's really big on the mindset. When they say, when they say like we're on different levels and like stuff like that, they're really meaning like our mindsets are different. The stuff you are thinking about and the stuff you like doing and all that, like it's different. It's different for me. Like, and I think like if anybody knows like the rap scene, like Jay-Z says it's like Jay, you can you can use Jay-Z and you can use other rap with for the level thing. Like, you can't put a rapper like Kodak Black or a rapper like Gucci Man on uh a Jay-Z level. It's different, like they say, it's level to this shit, and they're not on the same level at all. So I got the uh so I got the definition out, uh, Marin Webster's dictionary level, and it says a specific height. And the second definition says an amount or something. And like, like you said earlier, like sometimes like when we gotta meet each other on the same level. And like, you know, not all our Star Wars, you know, we all not always on the same level, but that's why, that's why we got each other so we can we can we can learn those different different heights and help each other, you know, not just meet them, but but exceed them. Absolutely. It's all about leveling up. All about leveling up. You should never want to be on the same level in life. Always want to level up in life. All right, so on a scale of one to ten, I don't know, what's your stress level right now? Uh I can actually say is uh probably between uh I can say a three and a five. I can say a three and a five, and because it was worse than that a few days ago. But like we were talking about earlier, we did something and like it was a it was what we so it was what we were supposed to do because it was something that got us through the ugly and the bad a year ago at this time. This same time it got us through. So we had to we had to do it again. We had to we had to let us we had to let ourselves know. We had to we had to stay still and let him be the Lord. Absolutely. I I love that you said that because with the second definition where it says an amount or something like amount, like when I think of the word amount, I think of like measurement and like you know, like whenever you're dealing with problems that you you have like necessary force and excessive force, like when you're dealing with with like how to reach a solution and stuff like that, and like really knowing what measure to use, you know, like again, like we we we we need others, like we can't oh we can't always figure stuff out on our own because we gotta we gotta make sure we have somebody there to to tell us like they see the same thing we see, those opinions and thoughts. Absolutely. So thank y'all once again for tuning in and make sure y'all share this video with William Star Wars and leave a like. Star Wart out. Two time.